Dial R for relegation

Gruesome ending in prospect for North End’s season

I have always been a fan of horror stories and enjoy watching a scary movie, but watching North End’s season unfold gives me nightmare and I wake up in a cold sweat the morning after every match.

I have to check the Championship table on the Internet to get reassurance that it was just that – a bad dream. But two cups of strong coffee later and reality sets in – we are bottom of the table, three points adrift and six points from safety.

One upon a time, you could be confident that the heroes would pull through, evil would be destroyed and all would be well. But modern horror stories are unpredictable. Some leave you with a feeling that all will never be the same again and other end in bloody slaughter and unimaginable hell.

Glory

The good thing about this particular story is that it’s a long way off being finished.

We are only on chapter 18, with another 28 chapters still not committed to print. Time for heroes to be made, new characters to be introduced, plots to be re-written, new directors and producers to be brought on board who could turn this B movie into a box office hit.

My favourite horror movie maker was Mr H – Alfred Hitchcock. He was probably at his best when North End were last in the top flight of English football, so I don’t expect many of the club’s younger fans to know much about him or his wonderful productions – a bit like the team really, not a lot remains of the glory days.

So, what of our very own Mr H – Trevor Hemmings? Is he willing to risk his cash? Can he bring in some star players and experienced directors? Can he re-write this story? Can he turn a comic horror into a fairy tale with a happy ending?

Onto chapter 19…