Man Utd star ‘has the body shape of a teletubbie’ and needs to go

Date published: Tuesday 13th March 2018 10:59

Man Utd readers discuss who they want to sign this summer and who should leave, while Liverpool fans backtrack on Dejan Lovren criticism and Arsenal supporters argue over the effectiveness of Mesut Ozil – all in our forum…

Join in the debate here…



6-1. They score first, we go ballistic in response. Valencia, Lukaku (3), Rashford (2) and Sanchez.

Wonderfuel Gas

Who’s scoring the own goal Wonderfuel?


Bailly again. Thought he was unlucky on Sat to give away that og. I’ve no problem with a CB giving away an og trying to defend like he was, it’s when they turn their back or look like they’re avoiding the shot and the ball loops in off them I’ve a problem with. United to win, 3-1.


Hoping we go at them and score early. 3-1 United.

No tinkering, same line up as Saturday please.


3-0. We go through and get shakhtar/roma in the quarters and pray man s***** end up getting real madrid!



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I’d say get rid of Darmian and bring in a left back to compete with Shaw and Young. Bring Tuanzebe and TFM back in to compete with Valencia at right back and save us around £50m.

Get rid of Rojo and bring in a top CB like Varane.

I’d go all out then to sign Willian for the right wing position.

Finally i’d bolster the midfield by picking up a replacement for Carrick who can compete with Matic, keep Fellaini and obviously continue with McTominay just to boil JM1502’s p***!

So outs are Darmian, Blind, Rojo, Carrick and Zlatan.

Ins are Sessegnon, Varane, Willian and maybe that SMS fella or Seri.



@happy – You wanted rid of Smalling after the Newcastle game,now he’s ‘Mr Wonderful’ again I wonder why?!.

I agree with all of your ‘outs’ but as usual it doesn’t go far enough I’m afraid mate.Our full back dept needs major surgery this summer and Luke Shaw has had more than his fair share of chances yet he still has the body shape of a teletubbie and can’t even get close to displacing the 33 years old Ashley Young so something is seriously amiss there,added to which we have Antonio Valencia at the same age as Young blowing through his arse and increasingly showing his age as well.

As for Fellaini,thank f*** he fancies a move away on a Bosman and the sooner that clumsy oaf is long gone from OT the better,simple as that.


Smalling has been great since his mistake though, Blacky, credit where it is due?


@happy – Now’t wrong with giving credit for a couple of good games pal but to want him out then not want him out because of it doesn’t stack up as a long term strategy now does it?.

Smalling and your crock mate Jones have failed to sustain an acceptable level of performance over a very long period and that is how they should be judged,simple as that.




I think people are going over board on Lovren.

He’s handled Lukaku very well in previous games. During any given game a 6’4 target man striker will get his head on the ball a few times. It’s how we deal with that is the issue and we didn’t deal with it well particularly with the knowledge that they had already been targeting TAA at right back.

It’s no surprise that’s it’s TAAs man that scored both goals yet I don’t see people giving him the abuse Lovrens getting, and neither should they.

Our ability as a team to support and help a team mate that was quite obviously being targeted from kick off comes into question.

Let me be clear here. I am in no way absolving Lovren of responsibility or suggesting he’s a long term option, I just think poeple are going over the top on the criticism because of who it is and what he’s done previously.


Yup ginger i dont blame lovren wholly for the 1st goal. Taa shouldve been closer with his man. He was ball watching.



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Just reading James Pearce saying how we missed Henderson in the “lions den”. Seriously!!! I don’t think Henderson would’ve made any difference what so ever & he’s certainly not a player I’d say would be the one to stand up when the going gets tough.

Each to their own I suppose, we all have different views.


Totally with you number8, Hendo would have made less than no difference. That’s why Klopp started without him.




Just read that Oz has reached 50 assists quicker than any player in PL history. I’ve been one of his many critics but that’s a pretty impressive stat, as stats go – especially when you consider the players he’s had around him during that time, not one of whom could be described as a prolific goalscorer.

He does get a lot of stick and a lot of it’s probably deserved. Doesn’t matter how many assists he gets, there’s no excuse for disappearing in games or strolling around the pitch like he’s out for a Sunday walk, but credit where it’s due. Does make you wonder how much quicker he would have reached this milestone if he turned up every game and had had better quality in front of him.

Al The Gooner

Aubemyang should theoretically bring the better side of his game to the fore. We need runners, that means the onus should be the players playing out wide. It’s didficult because we don’t have any wingers as well. But he is someone that can connect the dots without even trying, always loved his ability but it’s a shame that sometimes he does tend to go missing.

The bsm walk

It’s a bit of a love/hate relationship I have with Oz.I love him because of the talent he posesses,I hate him because of his inconsistency and poor attitude.Yes,some people fail to notice his game sometimes,but he does deserve criticism many a time.

His movement in middle of the pitch might be excellent,but I see him walking on the pitch far too often.For all those distance covered stat,what does he actually do though?I never see him press a player.And pressing is so so important for the system we play because we essentially are not a confident posession side.

No one is telling him to run around like a headless chicken,but you just never see him pressing the opposition at all.Even when he gets the ball,his eye for a pass is not doubtful.What is doubtful is his directness,he needs to be more direct and shoot at goal more often.


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If i was the opposition manager,It wouldn’t be tough to contain him because you know he’s always going to pass even if there’s an open goal.

There are many things that he can improve on.But most importantly,he desperately needs a change in manager.We need a guardiola/sarri type manager where we become a confident posession side and then he will consistently give brilliant performances.But until then,I wouldn’t at all hate to lose oz.

Like I said fantastic talent but maybe not for this team.

the specialone

I agree with all the posts, fantastic record and outstanding when we are playing well, but horrible to watch when we are struggling. He would not survive under Simionne, Conte or Klopp as they would not accept passengers, Wenger is perfect for him as he allows him to get away with murder when we are up against it. At least now when we play away in tough games Wenger will sometimes give him a fake injury and play someone who will put a shift in.




The problem is that we have a manager that is not flexible with formation,always a plan a even when it’s obviously not working.

Juventus started with 343 against Spurs and were turn to pieces.but Allegri being a wile fox switched to 424 and turn the game when winning switched to 442 to stifle the game.

Zidane an inexperienced coach was able to switch formations within game with psg from 433 to 442 to win.

Conte have seriously let me down with his stubbornness at times he reminds me of a more successful Roy Keane because they were identical footballers in there playing days.


ShedEnd – how would you propose that we do that…?

As stated many times previously, the Chelsea managers are always under great pressure to deliver and history shows us that they all prefer to rely on experience rather than take a gamble on untried youth – regardless of how good fans feel the players may be

For those lucky enough to get a chance they have to impress and obviously each manager has his own set of criteria to determine whether a player does that or not


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For all his faults this season I do believe that Conte has tried to give the younger players their chances but in all honesty I cannot say that Kenedy or Musonda really stood out and impressed. The only player that I recall who immediately impressed was Zouma and some would argue that he does not count as one of our “youth” – but for me he was young when he came and to keep Cahill out of the team showed that he took his opportunity well

There is no doubt that year upon year we have some talented young kids ranging from all levels, however, Chelsea as a Club seem to have a significant problem in getting them to take that big step to the next level. For many, we try to use the loan system rather than keep them on the bench (and only so many can sit on the bench) but still we struggle to bring anyone through. I do not think we are alone in this problem because most of the top clubs do buy rather than integrate internally but there are exceptions so hopefully ours will come along soon…? KTBFFH



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